Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Loud and Proud

"Kehat kabir suno bhai sadho, baat kahun mein khari
Yeh duniya ek numbari, to mein dus numbari"

-dus numbari

The rapid rise in our fairly fullblown relationship with google and its wonderfully integrative online services has fueled a certain fear of a big brother threat arousal in google. Chrome was the latest and biggest of the fear catalysts but that did not stop people from switching over anyway. Google is just faster, better and more addictive than any other communication tool. But as your online persona grows in detail, its importance to others follows suit. Since your employer drafts you only after an exhaustive run through on your facebook page, it becomes important to monitor and introduce traits in your visible profile that meet the world's expectation of greatness in you. However even that will be threatened in the near future when your online persona is what the world looks you up for, what they think you are and admit you are once the web 2.0 concept monopolizes the service. Therefore, like robot insurance, you will need to salvage and promote your uniqueness in every way right now when the system is still primitive. Never lose your USP, without it you are an R K Laxman cartoon.

Therefore, in an entirely philanthropic interest, i give you the Official checklist to establish your uniqueness in your self-described online persona

5. Twitter with your last name. Educate the world on your unique finds. Inspire them. Save them.

SYNTAX: [name/twist on name] [misplaced punctuation] [tweet]

example: Ankit ....:-P:-):-*........LOVZZZ A COMPLICATED THINGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ... ...

4. Remind the world of your unique existance. drop a hi. Never more but definitely in good frequency to a good sample set of friends and random strangers.

SYNTAX:

hi

example:

Rajat ManU- 5-2...:

hi

~Saravanan Magesh~:-)~RAHUMAN OSKARRRRRRR!!!! :
haii
3. Communities and fan pages. These are the fraternities and sororities of your online future. You can never have enough brothers and sisters. Spread you ideas among your peers and engage in constructive discussions.

SYNTAX:
[title]
[list of members]
[unlimited description]
[forum]

Example:

Janki Miss Fans

Description: WE MISS YOU SO MUCH JANKI MISS. FOR ALL THE FANS OF THE GREATEST PT TEACHER! PLEASE JOIN!!!
members: 21

Forum: Topic Posts

For a good time, call Jasmine 1
Boys Vs girls game 341
What is your favorite colour house 667

2. Test your curricular side. Take quizzes. Find out which Chuck Norris fact describes you best. Share it with the world. And your take on it.

SYNTAX:

[your comment]
[quiz name and result]
[others' comments]

Example

Kamlesh Shah I am sorry for taking so much quizes.

You took the ' Which Ace detective are you?' quiz. The result was The Green Hornet. You are a sensitive individual. You show remarkable intelligence and your friends look to you for assistance when in trouble. You are resourceful and committed to your work. You are fairly conversant with computers. You like music and have a heart of gold. Some people do not like you but your friends like you. You wear a green mask and have a martial artist for a man friday.

Jake Stubbins and 3 others like this.

Jake Stubbins at 1:34 am
Cool buddy! :)

1. Assert your uniqueness on your profile. State clearly what the world should think of you. Facilitate their absolute lack of perception. This is your primary aid.

SYNTAX:

be creative

Example:

Rahul ........HARMANNN BAWEJA ROCKSSSS@

Relationship status: Its complicated
Phone number: cal me i wil tel u
email: mail me i wil tell u
hometown: Bhopal
Interests: cricket, reading
Sports: Cricket
Books: All wodehouse and harry potter Dan brown booksssssss
Music: dream theatre, iron maiden, metallica, godsmack, rammstein, journey, ac/dc, children of bodom, slayer, poets of the fall, slipknot, pearl jam, black sabbath, hell's angels, rasmus, marilyn manson, Diamond head, Kreator, Destruction, Megadeth, Shadows Fall, All That Remains, Killswitch Engaged, Silent Civilian, Dragonforce, Poison, Biohazard, Kill them all, Vomit eaters, Axe in my head, Judas Priest, Motley Crue, Rage against the Machine, White Zombie to name a few
Food: all types i am a major foodie.
*IMPORTANT*
about me: i am not your average guy. I am a rebel. I am idiosyncratic and irrascibal. but i am also very sensitive on the inside. i give a lot of love and expect back also.

lIFe iZ A GamE aNNd I mA PlaYaH




-end




Congratulations. You are now truly unique.



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